My 2020 Word Is...

9 out of 10 people will fail with their resolutions.

 

50% of resolution makers will fail by the end of January.

 

But One Word sticks!

 

That's why this year I have decided not to make a New Year's resolution and have decided to pick one word for the upcoming year. No resolutions, no goals... just one word that gives meaning, mission, passion and purpose. One word that will help me be my best.

This blog started 10 years ago with 50 things in my 50^th year and has continued with twelve 5Ks in 12 months, 12 books in a year, multiple resolutions and goals, etc., because I wanted this blog to be a journal of sorts that had some meaning.

This January rather than choosing goals to focus on, I am choosing a word, one word to live by. Last year was the first year I chose a word, but I also chose goals. This year, I am going to just focus on a word. While it does not replace specific goals in my life, a word kind of becomes a mantra for me. I love the intention it sets and the positivity it generates to kick off the next 12 months. It helps me focus and remember what I am working on. 

 

My 2019 word was a good summary of what I wanted to see happen, and I love how it followed me into spring, summary, and fall, and fit even as life changed dramatically. 

 

How do you narrow down a word of the year? How do you summarize your hopes, goals, and plans in one word?

To make it work well, it cannot be a quick decision. It's a process that involves personal reflection and planning for me. I had been meditating and praying about it, and then the last Sunday of 2019 as I was sitting in church, Pastor Jesse was teaching and several times during the sermon Pastor Jesse talked about being authentic and I knew what my word was going to be. 

 

This year my word is … Authentic.

I love this quote - “To be authentic, we must cultivate the courage to be imperfect – and vulnerable. We have to believe that we are fundamentally worthy of love and acceptance, just as we are. I've learned that there is nop better way to invite more grace, gratitude, and joy into our lives than by mindfully practicing authenticity.” – Brene Brown

Authenticity itself is hard to define.

To become more authentic and seek this out in others, we first need to be open-minded. We attract the people and things we want in life when we are open-minded and receptive. This often leads to opportunities and new ways of thinking that expand our minds and bring us ideas that add value to our lives. 

Authentic people are high-character individuals who don't just "talk the talk," they also "walk the walk," which means they back up their positive, empowering words with actions that benefit themselves and others. Be true to yourself and do what you say you are going to do. 

As 2019 is winding down and 2020 is just around the corner, I thought it was a good time to blog about an update on my 2019 goals, one of which was to choose a word – my word -- intentional, live inentionally, be intentional. "Cultivate these things. Immerse yourself in them. The people will all see you mature right before their eyes! Keep a firm grasp on both your character and your teaching. Don’t be diverted. Just keep at it. Both you and those who hear you will experience salvation.” 1 Timothy 4: 15-16

I think that as we mature, we realize that time truly is of the essence in our life, and we develop a desire of wanting to know that our time here on earth counted, mattered. I was questioning a lot going on in my life at the end of 2018. This made me realize that I needed to live with more intention in my life so that was why I chose this word.

It should be every Christian’s desire to live actively and intentionally for Jesus. Our conduct reflects on our Lord; we should want to be the best representatives for Jesus we can be.

Digital Detox – Technology is truly a wonderful thing. It makes the world smaller, connects people and helps create communities – but are we getting too much of it, and if so, how do we cut back?

Our mobile devices make everything – including ourselves – available on-demand 24/7, and that can make it hard to switch off. It's no surprise that digital well-being is a hot topic right now and the tech and social media giants are taking note. Tools like Apple's new Screen Time app and Google and Facebook's new dashboards now show us how we're spending our time onscreen and let us set limits on our app use, all in a bid to help us restore some tech-life balance. In order to achieve this, I went through my phone and purged apps that I had not used in a while.

With so many digital distractions it can be really hard to be present in the moment and focus on one thing at a time, whether at work, in life, or in fitness. Evidence shows the brain works best when it can focus on a single task for longer, but the multitasking we're all guilty of doing can reduce productivity by as much as 40%.

As well as impacting our concentration, we're finding it hard to shut down for fear of missing out (FOMO). Research shows our phones are the first and last thing we see each day. But what if we swapped the FOMO for JOMO, to rediscover the Joy Of Missing Out and reconnect with ourselves and our priorities offline?

We will never give up our gadgets completely, but here are some things I have adopted in my digital detox:

Prioritizing my sleep: To get a good night's sleep, it is proven that we need a quiet mind instead of being cognitively stimulated. Social media is designed to engage our brain, not relax it, and the blue light stops the release of melatonin, which is the signal that tells our body to sleep. To work on prioritizing my sleep, that means going to bed at a reasonable time, logging off at least 40 minutes before and I bought an alarm clock to wake me up instead of my phone, so you can keep your bedroom a completely tech-free zone. My phone charges in the living room overnight.

Practice mindfulness: When you undertake a digital detox, even if it's initially uncomfortable, you can start to look after yourself better, and the people and priorities in your life, better.
I noticed myself passively scrolling, so I try to remember to stop and become aware of what I am doing. I try to think of someone I can reach out to, or something I can plan to do offline, such as work on a craft, read a magazine, or exercise. Schedule things that aren't just a cognitive reward, but rewarding activities, and not just for you.

Set boundaries for intentional use. Be intentional about when and how you go online. Passively scrolling social media is one of the worst things we can do for our mental and physical health. Screen activity is nearly always sedentary and hunched over – when we put our screens away we immediately create the space for us to get moving.

Take baby steps, it's important not to set unrealistic goals if we want new habits to stick. Start small to stay on track. A lot of people sabotage their behavior when changing goals by trying to make too many big changes all at once. The best way to achieve lasting change is to break our behavior down and focus on embedding these into our routine. For example, I am working on instead of not checking my phone for the entire day, I try to set time aside where I leave my phone out of sight for 30 minutes or so. I also tried:
  •Ensuring you have a lunch break away from screens (including your phone)
•Taking time out from one social media channel at a time
•Turning your phone off at dinner time
•Banning tech from the bedroom and bathroom

A digital detox doesn't necessarily have to mean going cold turkey, and you don't have to lock your phone in a safe and disappear to a tech-free retreat. It's about re-framing our relationship with our technology so that it's more balanced.

Rebalancing our use of technology requires us to be more mindful and honest with ourselves about when these devices bring real benefits and when they start to ruin our quality of life. The many benefits are only worth it if they contribute to our overall happiness rather than undermining it.

In short, I need to be in control of my technology use – not letting it control me. I found that I am much healthier and happier as a result.


Now, comes the time for the harder part of the post for me to write, the part where I have to confess I didn't reach my goals. I used to say I failed, but failing is so negative. And, did I really fail? I choose to think of it as a learning experience about myself. I think we try to set not only too extensive of a goal but too many goals. We might really try to shoot for the moon too quickly and that doesn’t work out, or not only do we want to go to the moon but we want to go to Mars and Neptune and Saturn. And if we try to do all of those, we don’t have the mental and physical resources to be able to accomplish that. I have learned rather than set multiple goals, I am going to...

Stick to one thing.

Trying to accomplish multiple goals at once will quickly get overwhelming and only lead to failure. Stick to one thing, master it, and move onto the next. Having trouble deciding which goal to work on first? Maybe focus on the behaviors that get the mind and body running more effectively, like exercising, eating nutritious foods, or quitting smoking. Take inventory of all the goals you have for yourself and figure out which you are most passionate about. Think to yourself, ‘If I knew that this was going to be my final year on earth, how would I really want to spend that time?’

Take steps to make yourself accountable for your goals to help stay motivated. For example, if you aim to run a 10K, sign up for one and pay for it in advance. For some, announcing your goals on social media can also help some people stay motivated. Alternatively, simply sharing your goals with family members and close friends and discussing your progress with them can help keep you stay on track.

The most important thing is for you to feel confident and honestly your mental health! Happy start of the year!

So, rather than make resolutions/goals that I may or may not stick with for the entire year, I am going to choose one word to try to live by, to work into all facets of my life, but that is another blog post so stay tuned.